Follow My Thought, If You Will

        . . . . . . *Overwhelmed* . . . (No sense of direction). . . Lost. . . still trying to find my way. The thought of home always runs through my mind. . . the struggles, the constant worries, with the condition of the economy, not making enough . . . long shifts, two jobs, over working. . . trying to support a family. . . uneducated. .  only got through half of elementary. . .  struggled through the storm, all wanting The American Dream. . .somehow managed to stay happy, laughter is what glued the family together. . . was able to raise four children. . . trying their best in order to keep the kids satisfied, not hungry, have a roof over their heads, protected from the rain, the hail, the gust of the unfair, cruel dark world. . . providing light, comfort, safety, care, love. . . wake up everyday doing the same routine. . . and the worries continue. . . an endless cycle, an endless ride. . . constant prayers every night. . . 




. . . Trying to put myself in my parent's position is no easy task. Can you imagine what they have to deal with everyday? Being away from home in such a great distance (the opposite coast, different place, different situations), it made think about them. . . almost every night, I dream about them. . . they managed to raise me for twenty years, teaching me the fundamentals of life, of how to live an independent life, yet, I yearn to hear and see them.  .  . I have a phone but I rarely call home. . . I don't have the time to do so. . . I come home every day tired. . . hungry. . . drained. . . sleepy. . . worried about homework, work, my life. . .  




. . . . I'm almost at the end. . . I can picture myself walking the stage. . . in May I'll be graduating. .  assuming that I pass my classes. . .  before then, I have to make sure I'm able to have an idea of where to go. . . possibly find a job. . . possibly thinking about moving away from home in order to provide for myself. . . or if not. . ugh. . . . I don't even want to think about moving back home. . . I'm so confused. . . I don't know what to do. . . What should I do? . . . .


. . . .  get a job? Follow my dreams and possibly make it? I need a sign. . . I'm putting myself out there in the Universe and trusting The One above to guide me through this. . . with everything that's going on around me, I have to plan my next move, or else, nothing will get accomplished. I need motivation. . . I need a push. .  . I need to talk to someone. I need to talk to you. . . . 

The National Art Gallery 02/26/2012- "Glare Shine"